Monday, June 18, 2007

The Trapster

Ok, so, The Trapster. Wow is he super lame. Super Powers: none. Special Abilities: none. Basically, his whole thing is that he developed some kind of super powerful glue and then he developed a glue gun to use it. Then he decided to use this amazing technology for evil. You read all of that correctly, I'm not making any of it up; the only thing he's got going for himself is a glue gun. That's how he fights Superheroes, with some glue. So it shouldn't come as a suprise that he gets his ass kicked on a regular basis. I mean, basically, you could just walk down to the nearest Home Depot and become The Trapster if you really wanted to. It's really that easy. The hard part would be going up against Cap or Iron Man or Thor or Spidey when you're just packing glue. After you start losing to guys like Antman or Nomad, it's probably time to rethink your career choice.

So a little back story on the old Trapster, and again I am totally not making this up, but his original evil-doer name was Paste-Pot-Pete. Yep, that's right, his original name was Paste-Pot-Pete. Wow. I guess that's how they did things back in the '60s. Apparently, Spider-Man doubled over in laughter one time way back in the day and that hurt really hurt poor Pete's feelings. Then he joined the Frightful Four and they said his name wasn't wasn't Frightful enough, so they made him change his name and his costume. Apparently, no one was interested in buying what Paste-Pot-Pete was selling. After this amazing transformation (well, at least the name and costume) he was somehow able to secure a victory over Daredevil. However, he does hold the embarrassing distinction of being the first villain to be defeated by an empty building when he tried to enter the old Baxter Building and couldn't get past the security systems. Totally awesome.

If you'd like to build your own Trapster Paste Gun, I scanned in the technical drawings from the Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe, Deluxe Edition. Here's his paste gun and his paste shooters. Knock yourself out. It'll make a great Halloween costume.

Anywho, I think the last time the Trapster was seen in Marvel 616 continuity was in Silver Sable #26. Rumors abound that he was a villian in the 1602 universe, but that he had more of a hunter/trapper shtick, which might have been kind of interesting, only if he hadn't stolen the idea from another, more established, supervillian (Kraven, anyone?).

So to wrap this thing up, we salute you, Trapster, for your amazing ability to snatch defeat from the claws of victory. Keep up the good mediocre work.

11 comments:

Ahi said...

Ridiculous! Look out, it's the Crapster! I wonder how long he has to spend each night cleaning out all his gear. He must have also invented a super solvent to make sure his guns don't seize up perminantly.

Tyler said...

I didn't mention it, but he did invent a solvent and he coated his shoes in it so he could walk around while some superhero was trapped in some glue. So the thing is, he was captured a few times, so why didn't the police replicate the solvant so guys like Spidey and Cap don't have to waste their time capturing this guy? They've got bigger problems to deal with. I'm sure Reed Richards could have worked on it and then hooked them up with a batch of it if they asked him.

chris said...

Clearly you guys don't understand the genius behind Trapster's methods. Have you seen those glue traps for mice? The mouse is there for 3-5 days, immobile and starving to death. All Trapster needed was more time and he could have beat the entire Marvel universe by forced starvation.

Tyler said...

Dammit. I shoulda made a Trapster reference when Dave had the picture of that Dr. Doom mousetrap he made on his blog. That woulda been super awesome.

I think that even the lamest superhero in the Marvel Universe (my vote would go to D-Man) could easily escape from one of the Trapster's glue traps within 3-5 days and thus avoid death by starvation.

Jason said...

Ok first of all, the lamest superhero HAS to be Starfox. Starfox is proof positive that when Marvel writers are thinking of new characters they refer to a list that has two separate columns of different powers listed in each column and they pick one or two from each. For example, column A will have the MAIN powers (your super-strength and flight) while column B may have some ANCILLARY powers that nobody could survive with on their own (super-vision, ultra powered taste buds, etc.).
In Starfox's case, he was given strength and flight from column A and from column B, he was given the all-important power of...super charm.

(I would have loved to have been in that editorial meeting when Starfox was first proposed as a character. "Ummm...super charm?" "Well, it's either that or hyper-ventriloquism")

But I digress...

About the Trapster, though, look at that drawing of him. That dude's HUGE!!! I wouldn't mess with him! I mean, why would somebody with arms that large of a build have to resort to using glue to succeed in his life of crime?

But I thank you for this profile of the Trapster. The next time you profile a lame hero/villain, may I request my vote for lamest villain: Modak?

Ahi said...

"Hyper-ventriloquism" has to be one of the funniest things I've ever read. That is genius! Well done Jason, well done indeed!

Tyler said...

Dave from daveslongbox covered Modok already. There's some gold in the Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe, Deluxe Edition, I'll be scanning in other superbad heroes and villians and writing some more about them. Also, we might have to do a week specifically devoted to Starfox. I'll talk to my sidekick Chris about it.

Tyler said...

Oops, that was a review of MODAM (the Female version of Modok), so maybe there IS room for a Modok review.

Jason said...

How does someone profile MODAM but not MODOK? Or should we just assume that profiling one is as good as profiing the other?

And also, how is MODOK/MODAM still running/floating/levitating around with that big ass TV for a head? Dude, it's the 21st century...if you're going to have a TV for a head, at least make it a flat screen! Freak.

Tyler said...

I think Dave said he likes Modok, but considered Modam to be inferior. And ugly.

And I agree, Modok needs an upgrade. To at least a 40" HD LCD TV.

Jason said...

MODAM IS inferior! However, I think if I were a criminal mastermind putting together a syndicate, I'd prefer MODAM over MODOK and why not? Same job, less pay.